THE ELECTRICAL LIFE OF LOUIS WAIN Trailer (2021)

English artist Louis Wain rises to prominence at the end of the 19th century for his surreal cat paintings.

In theaters OCT 22.

WTF is this? Cat paintings? Cumberbatch? I’m confused and completely uninterested.

Maybe I should start painting cats? Hamsters? Hedgehogs? Wait… I got it. Chipmunks.

Spencer Trailer #1 (2021)

US Release Date: November 5, 2021
Starring: Kristen Stewart,Timothy Spall, Jack Farthing, Sean Harris, Sally Hawkins
Directed By: Pablo Larraín
Synopsis: In 1991 while spending the Christmas holiday with the royal family at Sandringham House, Princess Diana decides to leave Prince Charles.

Quick Fact: The movie gets its title from Diana’s maiden name, Spencer, indicating that this was the moment Diana remembered who she was, and shirked off the Windsor name.

I had to look it up, since I could give a flying fuck about the royal family.

American Underdog Teaser Trailer (2021)

American Underdog tells the inspirational true story of Kurt Warner (Zachary Levi), who went from a stockboy at a grocery store to a two-time NFL MVP, Super Bowl champion, and Hall of Fame quarterback. The film centers on Warner’s unique story and years of challenges and setbacks that could have derailed his aspirations to become an NFL player – but just when his dreams seemed all but out of reach, it is only with the support of his wife, Brenda (Anna Paquin) and the encouragement of his family, coaches, and teammates that Warner perseveres and finds the strength to show the world the champion that he already is. American Underdog is an uplifting story that demonstrates that anything is possible when you have faith, family and determination.

Sniff. Sniff. What’s that I smell? It’s the fishy smell of OUR LORD JESUS! PRAISE BABY JESUS! BABY JESUS MADE ME THROW THAT FOOTBALL REAL REAL FAR!

NIGHTMARE ALLEY | Official Teaser Trailer | Searchlight Pictures

In NIGHTMARE ALLEY, an ambitious carny (Bradley Cooper) with a talent for manipulating people with a few well-chosen words hooks up with a female psychiatrist (Cate Blanchett) who is even more dangerous than he is.

Del Toro has been hit or miss lately, but this looks promising.

Steven Spielberg’s “West Side Story” | Official Trailer | 20th Century Studios

From 20th Century Studios, The Walt Disney Company will release “West Side Story” in U.S. theaters on December 10, 2021.

It’s amazing how Spielberg has shot this to make it have a “classic” look, instead of, I dunno, a modern look? Or perhaps a “re-imagining” in a fucking CURRENT TIME? I think there is a missed opportunity here. It could have been all those POC supporters of AOC verses the white Trump supporters. And to make it REALLY obvious, just rename the SHARKS vs the JETS to the BROWNS vs the JETS. (You thought I was gonna say “whites” didn’t you… you PIG.)

Ron’s Gone Wrong | Official Trailer | 20th Century Studios

“Ron’s Gone Wrong” is the story of Barney, a socially awkward middle-schooler and Ron, his new walking, talking, digitally-connected device, which is supposed to be his “Best Friend out of the Box.” Ron’s hilarious malfunctions set against the backdrop of the social media age, launch them into an action-packed journey in which boy and robot come to terms with the wonderful messiness of true friendship.

I thought the boy was Ron, and he’s gone wrong so his parents send him to Conversion Therapy.

LAST NIGHT IN SOHO – Official Trailer [HD]

In acclaimed director Edgar Wright’s psychological thriller, Eloise, an aspiring fashion designer, is mysteriously able to enter the 1960s where she encounters a dazzling wannabe singer, Sandie. But the glamour is not all it appears to be and the dreams of the past start to crack and splinter into something far darker.

I’ll bet it was nothing like my Last Night in Bangkok.

Moonfall Teaser Trailer (2022)

In Moonfall, a mysterious force knocks the Moon from its orbit around Earth and sends it hurtling on a collision course with life as we know it. With mere weeks before impact and the world on the brink of annihilation, NASA executive and former astronaut Jo Fowler (Academy Award® winner Halle Berry) is convinced she has the key to saving us all — but only one astronaut from her past, Brian Harper (Patrick Wilson, “Midway”) and a conspiracy theorist K.C. Houseman (John Bradley, “Game of Thrones”) believe her. These unlikely heroes will mount an impossible last-ditch mission into space, leaving behind everyone they love, only to find out that our Moon is not what we think it is.

Look for this in your local Walmart bin in 6 months.

NO TIME TO DIE | Final International Trailer

In No Time To Die, Bond has left active service and is enjoying a tranquil life in Jamaica. His peace is short-lived when his old friend Felix Leiter from the CIA turns up asking for help. The mission to rescue a kidnapped scientist turns out to be far more treacherous than expected, leading Bond onto the trail of a mysterious villain armed with dangerous new technology.

Here’s the problem with delaying movies due to Covid. I DON’T CARE ANYMORE! Release it on demand! I won’t be going back to the theaters ANYTIME SOON! Read my lips: “I DON’T CARE.”

Spencer

The marriage of Princess Diana and Prince Charles has long since grown cold. Though rumors of affairs and a divorce abound, peace is ordained for the Christmas festivities at the Queen’s Sandringham Estate. There’s eating and drinking, shooting and hunting. Diana knows the game. But this year, things will be
profoundly different. SPENCER is an imagining of what might have happened during those few fateful days.

Kristin Stewart is like a saltine cracker. White, plain and usually stale. Can she nail the accent? Who the fuck knows when she has ONE LINE in the trailer???!!!